Relationship Key to Successful Parenting
From the day your baby arrives your number one goal should be to get to know and love this precious gift. The key to developing close caring relationship is consistent respect. Ask yourself, “Am I being respectful? How would I feel if someone talked to me like I talk to my child?”
Respect Leads to Good Relationship
Respect the rights of your children as individuals. He/she has a right to privacy. Don’t demand the child confide in you. Instead, offer to be there if needed. Respect his right to have a secret. Respectful treatment comes across as caring or valued. Any time you make your child feel small, shamed, guilty, non-existent or embarrassed, you put her down, deny respect, destroy safety and damage self-esteem.
Obstacles to Communication
Obstacles to communication include disrespectfuol treatment; taking a child’s specialness for granted; disliking in them what you dislike in yourself; you-judgments; confusing behavior with the person; focusing on weaknesses instead of strengths, not taking them seriously; breaking trust. When you repeat what your child tells you in confidence, he is not likely to trust you again.
Sadly,. many parents who truly love their children wonder why the children don’t feel loved. Respect and direct personal involvement on the child’s level can make the difference. The opposite of love is not hate. It is indifference. Focus on the child, not on what you are doing for him. The child concludes, “I must matter because my folks take time to be with me and treat me with respect.”