Basic Needs for Everyone
All human beings, old and young, have three basic needs:
- They need to feel loveable
- They need to feel competent
- They need to have a sense of belonging
Fathers, how does your parenting help your children meet those needs? In order to help your children meet their needs, you must first examine yourself. Do you feel loveable, competent, and a sense of belonging? You will have a hard time giving what you don’t have.
Children learn from how you treat yourself and those around you. Do you treat your children as unique separate persons? Do you spend time with them finding out who they are:? Focused attention, trust, acceptance without judgment help them develop self esteem.
Do you encourage your children to own feelings and perceptions by listening to them with understanding? Do they feel loved and respected? If so, they will probably love and respect you.
Are you teaching them to manage themselves, their belongings, time, and money in age appropriate ways? If you manage yourself, your belongings, your time and money well, you will be able to teach them. They will learn because they see how it is done as well as by what you teach.
The last thing to ask yourself: How do you treat their mother? There is a saying, “The best thing a father can do for his children is to love and respect their mother.